10 Dumb stories countdown

10. 19 year old London man now in custody for driving 140 miles per hour along a busy London superhighway. Police got the arrest because they got a video of the chase scene like video. ‘really stupid ‘ say police not happy with high speed bad driving…the really stupid part tho is posting the video on youtube…which is how the cops made the bust.



9. A Hillyard Ohio high school student suspended from school for stealing a trick from something they did at Yale and punking the high school football fans of a cross-town rival. The rival fans were left instructions on their seat to hold up a placard and thus help spell out a giant message. It was supposed to spell GO DARBY. Instead it spelled WE SUCK. The student, whose probably considering a career in politics, was busted by his youtube video.





8. German police in Dusseldorf are wondering if they should even bother looking for a thief who stole an expensive brief case and then threw it away apparently not noticing it contained over 13 thousand dollars in cash. The cash was in two envelopes unopened. The Iranian businessman was happy to get back the case and amazed to get back the money.





7. Its slow in Desoto Missouri. Sometime around three in the morning a naked man waddled into Fish’s Quick shop and started doing the hula. It was all part of an elaborate plot. While the clerk was distracted two accomplices made off with a case of beer from out of the coolers. A customer got the get away license number. The three busted say they got no more hula and all the beers been drunk.





6. The Shaolins take it seriously. From their monastery in the Song Shan mountains in the Henan province of china its throw down time. Some Japanese are on the internet claiming there’s a ninja who challenged and beat the Shaolins, so the Shoalins called their attorney. There’s now a warning notice posted for the offender to confess and recant or else face the consequences. Really it’s a Japanese Chinese loss of face dispute. So its monk wars between the shaolins and the ninjas. Noting that for each dao discipline the physical part is the way to pray, let the better prayer win. And get an agent for the movie rights.





5. 45 year old Russian municipal worker arrested for theft of a bridge. It was a five yard long metal bridge over a tiny tributary northeast of Moscow. The man was busted on the black market. Police tracked it back after he cut the bridge in pieces and sold it for scrap.





4. Russian best friend of George Bush Valdimir Putin was standing along the shore of the Caspian sea for a photo opportunity for the regenerate the endangered sturgeon campaign when instead of just throwing the sturdeon into the Caspian sea, he held it up to his lips and gave it a kiss. The crowd seemed to like it, but don’t call him fishlips.





3. In the western desert state of Rajimstan in India, Nanu Ram Jogi is considered quite a guy. He has just fathered his 21st child. His wife is 50 years old. He himself is 90 years old. That’s 9-0. He says he’ll have another child when he’s 100, which is, of course, the same age as Abrahim when he fathered Isaac. So you see, it could happen. By the way, Mr Jogi lives at home with his immediate family which adds up to 109 children, grandchildren and in-laws. So how’s he able to pull this off? Mr. Jogi proclaims his secret is,quote ‘the miracle of camel’s milk’!





2. Chinese getting ready for hosting the Olympics are cracking down on Chinese menus. Its not censorship. Its translation. One menu item reads ‘steamed crap’ which a mispell of carp which no one was likely to notice. More honest menu renderings include the now banned ‘virgin chicken’ which is young c hicken on a plate. The government tourism board has released a list of 27 hundred approved and mandate menu item appellations. Not on the list is ‘temple explodes the chicken cube’… which is kung pao chicken.





1. And the number one top dumb story of the day remains Senator Potatohead (Republican of Idaho) as it keeps making less and less sense that he shouldn’t just stick a potato in it right now instead of dragging out the inevitable matter of his having to quit his senate job because,in the head of denial, Senator, you did plead guilty even though you now say you're really innocent and that gay thing is just a rumor and because, Senator, absolutely nobody, anywhere, believes you or the mess you have made for your family, the senate or the country. We would ask, however, Senator, that after you do quit, you should just go to the airport and get on the plane and get out of town and, Senator, try not to use an airport bathroom until your parole is up. Thank you.